Dachshund Makes New Years Resolutions

I never have before, but it seems that now some people think I need self-improvement.  A new year resolution is something you think up to let the people know you are going to improve.  I’m assuming they are also making improvements such as taking me for a walk every day.  Anyway I’m thinking on it.

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Here are my thoughts . . . How many resolutions do I need?  How do I know what needs improvement? Will I get any kind of reward for making resolutions?   

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What if I don’t make the right resolution?  What if I make the resolution and then I forget to keep it?  What if I don’t get a reward for it?

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Okay.  I think i’ve got it.  I have 4 legs, so I’ll make 4 resolutions.  Here they are:

1. Don’t dive into Lucy’s bowl when she lifts her head.

2. Don’t wake Bob up at 5:30.  Wait until 6:00.

3. Be more considerate about passing gas. (I think I figured out what “Ewwww, Puppy, Puppy!” means.)

4. Look at the camera every fourth picture.

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Did I do good?  About that reward . . .